It's all over with..for now..

It's been over a month since I blogged and it feels like two days. Once the semester started wrapping up the bow was slapped on top so quickly that I ran out of time to function. I have been struggling since the end of the semester figuring out where I am and what I am doing. Plus I have all this time and yet don't have a clue what to do with it. In fact I probably waste more than I should. So here is what happened since my last blog post.

I finished out the junior high! It was a huge relief. The junior high was such a test for me, I had hives everyday, lost all my confidence, and felt like I was drowning in a new sea of students. I know that the experience was one of learning and of course value but at the time I was just lost. I wasn't a "teacher" here, the kids had bigger issues, and there was no way for me to overcome my position to them because I was leaving just as soon as I had learned their names. Ultimately I think DESE made the poor choice here in changing the amount of time at our placements and I feel like if I had more time I could have had a more positive experience.

Graduation came so quickly like I blinked and it was over. I literally felt like I was in a time warp that Saturday. It was a wonderful feeling to know that I had worked very hard and reached my goal.
My family and friends celebrated with me at an after graduation lunch. I just soaked it all in because I REALLY have great friends and family and I love to spend time with them.



Since graduation there have been some sleepless nights, some tears, and a lot of cleaning. I really felt like I would graduate my life with fall together and I would feel this completeness but actually I was tired, wondering how I would keep my self occupied, and lost. I have spent a lot of time self reflecting and talking it out with my loved ones and I have come to realize I met my first major goal in life so it's time to set a new one. I can't slow down because time is still ticking by and I have many more things ahead of me like my wedding, finding my first job, and more!

So it's time for this blog to take a new direction as well as my life towards the wedding! We have like half a year and I really need to kick it into high gear. Starting now...literally I am at my mom's with planner in hand!!

(Sorry for all the rhyming me and Lexi have been reading a ton of rhyming books.)

Frustrated and Thankful

I have found the junior high to be my ultimate test.

 I am way out on a limb when I try to connect with these students. If I try I feel like I am just working to be a friend, if I don't try I can tell they don't give a hoot who I am or what I say. Most of them just cause trouble I think to watch how I react. I react frustrated most of the time because I am beyond frustrated. Although I know this is a learning experience and I know it will help me in the long run I am not happy with this four week sink or swim placement. Coming from a 12 week paradise where I would have worked for free for the rest of the year with kids I love who I still dream about, worry about, and hope that they are achieving their goals and making progress to a place where most students just call me Jordan is very hard to swallow. I gladly got to go back to see some of my littles this past week and I couldn't believe how they had grown. I was over the moon giving hugs and just seeing those smiles. I miss them everyday and I miss feeling comfortable and knowing what I am doing. I want to be able to own the room and take control but in just four weeks this is hard to do. As I get up everyday I just try to absorb everything I see, do, feel and remember that I am a teacher. I want to share my knowledge with kids no matter their age and I am capable of doing so.

As Thanksgiving break approaches I keep reminding myself how thankful I am for all that I have including an education that is going to lead me into doing what I have wanted to do since entering Mrs. Katzing's kindergarten class, TEACH!

Leaving the Littles...

Friday was my last day at the elementary school. I made it the whole day with no tears (thanks to Thursday night when I cried myself silly before bed)! I got so many cards, hugs, and sweet goodbyes. I certainly learned a lot in my first placement and created awesome bonds with many people.

Monday bright and early I headed right into that junior high school with my head up and big girl pants on. When I went through the school district the schools went K-5, 6-8, 9-12. My "high school" is now the junior high which houses 7-9. The building is very familiar to me but the way the kids act is not. It was a huge culture shock for me but went better than I thought it would. Obviously the kids are older and more independent but they are lovable, some more than others. I just keep reminding myself to think about how I was at their age and what they are going through. Like always the hardest kids to deal with are going through some of the hardest things in life. Making the adjustment is not easy nor natural but it is something I can work at. I also have a great supportive teacher who is ready to show me anything I ask.

Overall, I know that I want to be a teacher and that I could be successful regardless of grade level. Three days in and I am just not sure how I feel about 7-9 graders. They do make some fabulous art though.

Last Week Mid-Week Update

Leaving is like going through the stages of grief.

Monday I was in total denial. I just kept saying to myself you don't have to go, just keep showing up. I got my first set of cards and I read the sweet notes and just acted like I would for sure come back. There were some misty eyes when one of my fourth grade girls hugged me for a long time. She is a big sister and wonderful artist. I would say we both love a lot and made that connection.

Tuesday I felt like okay I can do this. I can say bye and give hugs and know that there are tons of teachers who love these kids like I do and will care for them. Leaving won't be too hard until a little girl in first grade touches your hand and tells you how much she will miss you.

It's Wednesday and I am just feeling devastated that I have to leave. It's like someone told me yesterday but really I have known for months and months this day would come and I am sad. I just love the school that I am in and the kids are just amazing. I'm going to really miss getting to know them more and more and watching them grow.

I have been thinking about the grade levels quite a bit and how each one is so different from the other. When I see FOURTH GRADE I know there will be a split between workers and talkers. My fourth graders love Minecraft and music so we always have tunes playing. These are my smallest groups and the most mellow. THIRD GRADE has worried me the whole twelve weeks I have been at the school They are a troublesome bunch...like diamonds in the rough. You really have to polish them up individually to see them shine. This week I said challenge yourself and see what happens when you teach them, It went really well! I was very excited and hope they become more aware of others as they grow up. SECOND GRADE is my little group of artists. These kids come in day after day ready to work. They are also amazingly quiet and focused. I love to see their creativity. After these grades come in I get a lunch break and then I have lunch duty with mixed age. OLDER MIXED AGE is an amazing community to watch. These students really work together and carry one another. There are also a couple mature beyond their years that I have found I really enjoy talking to. BABY MIXED AGE (my own nickname for them) are a handful. They have some very strong personalities in their group but their diversity makes them quite interesting. It's very fun to listen in on their conversations because their interests and values differ so much. They are also a very smiley group even if they are being disruptive. It is hard not to love OLDER and BABY MIXED AGE. I also know them best because I see them every single day. I would love for everyone in FIRST GRADE to worry about themselves but since that doesn't usually happen I just go with the flow. They tattle quite a bit but they also love art so its a trade off, listen to the tattles get good artwork. I love watching them assert some independence and be able to do more around the school because they have made it through the first year. This brings me  to KINDERGARTEN...a grade I never imagined loving as much as I do now. Between runny noses, untied shoes, paint in hair, rolling on the floor, taking naps in art, and everything else I have found that I just love these kids. I would take them all home if it wasn't illegal. There is just something about kindergarten that makes my heart swoon. I could tell you something I love about each and everyone of them. I am just drawn to their little faces and they truly make me so happy.

Here is a very long mid-week progress report of how I am handling the sadness of leaving one heck of a school. I am beyond thankful to have had this time and I plan on fully enjoying my last two days.  I can also assure you that the end of the week post will have pictures! 

We know about you...

"We know about you...we know you are going to go teach somewhere else."
 I had to miss class this week to get my cap and gown and go to a meeting. While I was gone the subject of where I was came up and some classes got the news that I would be leaving. So I have slowly told my students that this is my last week. I can really hardly believe it. I think time has sped up and I just don't like it. I want to stay there forever and ever like Neverland. Which is completely nuts. I know.

This week I heard all kinds of new descriptive words like fancy and lovely being tossed around the room. It makes my heart smile to think the students are so happy about what they are making that its not just good or nice its fancy!

I will say I now know why teachers like Halloween to be on Fridays. The kids were so excitable and loud Friday I really had to work to keep everything together. I was very excited myself because it was my first Halloween off since I began working at 17. Despite the holiday we were able to make some fantastic art! One of the funnest parts of my day was with first grade. At the end of class over the intercom the Munster's theme song played and then our principal talked about Halloween safety so I panicked thinking the kids needed to get lined up. I lined them up and looked at the clock and there was 8 minutes left! 8 minutes is an eternity in first grade so I turned on the monster mash and we did the twist. It was hilarious to have them follow along with me and a good way to shake out some jitters before their fall parties.

Here is to all the love I will share my last week in Placement #1.

Two weeks left!

I have two weeks left at my elementary school and I have already cried about it this week. I really love the school I am in, I'd like to take more than my fair share of kids home, annnd I have an amazing group of educators around me that I love to learn from. I just really can't imagine not seeing these people everyday and being a creature of habit doesn't help me anticipate the change that is going to come.

One of my favorite things about having students in the art room is just allowing them to be them! I try really hard to let their creative juices flow freely and cater to their needs. I love listening to their stories and watching them interact. I have a few students who really stick to the individuality in fact one declared herself just E. So of course I had to go with it because who hasn't thought about trying a new name before? I also love that the students are able to feel like they can be an individual in our room because all artwork is unique!

This week we had a few fun station days to relieve some of the stress around parent teacher conferences. One of the items students could work with was modeling clay. We had some extruders out that when you pushed the clay through it made "hair." One of my little girls was asking another student to use it and calling a wig maker. She is very petite and her voice is very small so hearing her say "Can I use the wig maker now?" was too much for me and I couldn't help but laugh. I will certainly be using that technical name in my future classroom!

This week I shoot some images of student artwork so you can see what we have been working on.

:)

Get that ball rollin'!

Man, once the ball starts rollin' it keeps on going! I have successfully taken on full days of teaching. It has been so much fun! I am really hitting that comfort spot and realizing that this time is not going to last forever. Sad but true, so here is to the good times! (and a longer post next week)

Sorry Michelangelo I had to censor this for my classroom! This was so hilarious to me!

Teacher Teacher!

Last week's post was minimal at best. I hit a hard spot in my teaching where I really felt like I was going backwards. I wasn't prepared for class, I didn't feel like I was doing my best, things had just started to come loose. Luckily I have an amazing support group behind me and they started steering me back on the right path.

Monday! What a Monday indeed. There were some issues with students but my lunch crowd always makes me smile. I have a friend who always starts off with "I have something to tell you, it's actually a long story so you may want to sit down." Then he comes up with something a little silly to say and we go about our lunch. Lunch also brings so meaningful hugs. It's like we all know we are half way through the day and these hugs say "You can do it!"

Teaching Tough on Tuesday! Holla! Tuesday I turned it around. I was pretty timid in the morning...still trying to build myself up but that afternoon I wrangled first grade and Kindergarten. Kindergarten brought out the teacher in me. I had total control of the room. We painted, cleaned up, and read a story. When one of my friends decided they didn't need to join us I didn't let that stop me I took charge and showed them I was capable of managing the classroom! I felt like Rocky at the top of stairs afterwards just pumping my fists! I am so thankful I had this day because I feel like I can do this and I am capable of keeping a classroom together.
I also witnessed some of my friends branch out today on the playground by going out to join their friends. I often have a few friends that hang around and watch everyone else have a good time but this morning my shyest friend ran by me yelling and playing. I have worried about him from day one so this really warmed my heart.

Wednesday and Thursday I was really thinking about how valuable every single minute is in a classroom. There is so much to be done at all times that it is really useful to multitask and do it well.

Friday!!!! I missed class and my kids but I went to the MAEA fall conference. It was once again awesome! I love going to see my friends, get more ideas, and relax a little!



Here we go again!

One Positive Note

We rocked the school carnival! That's all for this week partners! Yee HAW!

My First Teaching Tears

This week has been quite an emotional week for me. I am trying to come to terms with trusting myself and thinking "I do in fact know what I am doing in the classroom". Teaching and presenting the lessons are coming easier and easier to me. Plus I am receiving great feedback learning from one of the best teachers I could have ever imagined. So why was I crying this week?!

I love the kids in my school. I know so much about them and I feel like I make instant connections with them. I could spend all day talking to them just learning about their little worlds. So this week proved to show me that not all of the kids I am growing to love come from loving environments. Not every adult they meet shows them the love and respect they deserve and my heart hurts when I think about this. My tears came from the frustration I feel when I think that people can't see the wonder in kids. They are such amazing little people with such beautiful minds I could not imagine doing anything else in the world.

I am so thankful to be a truly loving school and seeing that it makes a difference when the kids know their school cares about them

This coming week is going to be a busy one with meetings, class, and observations I hope it all goes smoothly and I get enough sleep!

JUST Keep ON Keeping ON

This week really kept me on my toes. I had all kinds of wacky things happen to me like hitting a student in the forehead with a binder clip, having one student exclaim he was my dream come true, and I have students (mostly youngers) who pet my fingernails. I always have my nails painted and I guess it intrigues them because if I lay my hand down on the table they just lovingly pet me. It's a little odd and a little heart warming all at the same time.
I also had an incident this week when I decided to treat myself to a little caffeine. I took a different cup to school so I wasn't really thinking when I dumped my soda into it and sat it on the desk just waiting for the fizzy goodness later on during my plan. I was talking away and popped up the spout when coke went flying across the table all over my hair, in my shirt, and down my capris. Needless to say I will not bring that cup back.
My main laugh this week has been asking student's their names and then not being able to understand what they say. Since I teach art I am faced with the challenge of learning every students name and naturally I don't have them all down so when I ask for a hint there are times I have no idea what the student is saying which can be pretty awkward for both of us.

Over all teaching is going great! No matter what wacky things happen to me I always feel happy teaching and I am slowly learning to just go with the flow. Especially in what I like to call the Zoo which is often referred to as Kindergarten. Now don't get me wrong Kindergarten fascinates me and I have found I know most of their names because I just love their little personalities so much! BUT, there is no doubt about it Kindergarten gets crazy and in the art room it gets very stressful having them all doing what they think is right which has proven to sometimes be wrong. Lucky for me I am not alone in the wrangling and I had a successful Friday teaching them. :)

I just have to remember to keep on keeping on...

My first apple!

Can I smell that?!?

Week 3 started with a three day weekend for teachers, four day for students. That is probably enough information to let you imagine how my week went but I will go ahead and fill in all the fun details for you.

Sunday I had a full blown runny nose, stuffy head, cough, and chest congestion going on so I tried to take it easy Monday and get pumped up for Professional Development on Tuesday. Professional Development had some amazing speakers available for us teachers and I learned about where motor development begins and how choices made from birth by parents affect our students in the classroom. This was something I really knew nothing about and I have applied what I have learned already in my classes!
 Wednesday and Thursday were quite the test for me. In fact I felt like the week would never end. I wasn't getting good rest, I didn't make it to the store, I was almost late one morning after locking my keys in my house, and I would start a coughing wave in class every time I even had a tickle in my throat. In the classroom everything went very well! I taught Kindergarten or as I like to call it the Zoo, I taught Mixed Age and Second grade. Each time my confidence has grown and I am so thrilled with teaching I can barely contain myself. I will also admit I am extremely spoiled with the most amazing mentor teacher who has made me feel at home from the first second I walked in the door.

Friday is a much better day for me as I feel much better and we had a very successful day in the classroom. We painted!! All grade levels used watercolors today and everyone did an amazing job. In fact one student asked "Can I smell that?" after the demonstration and since I couldn't smell all week I found this to just make me giggle inside.

Hello weekend!

WoooHOOOO Labor DAY Weekend!

Can I just say I love me a three day weekend?!

I hope all the kiddos are getting to have fun this -extended- weekend while we teachers get back at it tomorrow!

This week I really had a chance to look at how to handle "mistakes" in the art room. It can be so hard to translate what you see in your head to paper or any other medium really so I try to be understanding with the students who are looking to start over. In our classroom we don't let students start over unless there is no way to "fix" what marks have been made or the student is truly upset with their artwork. Our approach is to take the time to speak with the student about what they were trying to achieve and how they can accomplish that. I love helping a student figure out that their "mistake" is not in fact a mistake but a different approach to get their desired finish product. Not only are we helping students be flexible, solve problems, and think critically we are teaching them that art is beautiful when the effort from the artist shines through.

Wednesday was my first night class which I was very tired during but I love seeing my other future teachers and talking everything out.

Friday was Jeans Day/carry in lunch...man can the teachers in my building cook! I'm still in love with teaching! Bring it on Week 3!

Week 1 Complete!

I have officially survived week one of student teaching! I am so happy to be in a classroom learning and teaching with the new student teaching model, co-teaching. I am currently teaching kids K-4 in the art room of course!  I have learned so many hilarious and serious things this week I can tell I will have many stories to share. The hardest part of the week is getting up and out of bed. I am realllly not a  morning person so even with Roy poking me I try to stay asleep as long as possible. Once I do get up its best not to talk to me, I am really like a woken bear that has been sleeping all winter. :)

Monday and Tuesday were meetings and working in the classroom with my cooperating teacher. I really enjoyed getting to see how a classroom comes together and being in the building early to build relationships. My school has some seriously awesome and welcoming staff!
Wednesday was my university meetings where I meet my mentors there and covered all the course work I will have (yay!). Can I just say thank heavens for calendars!?
Thursday and Friday we had kids in our room! I was so nervous I was sure I would be sick but both days went great! I am so excited in to be in a classroom especially when my mentor teacher is so amazing and supportive. We have really hit it off!

Here are some of the silliest things I learned in week one>>>

Kindergarteners can literally sleep anywhere including sitting up on a carpet. We let the little guy nap on Friday because really who doesn't need a nap on Fridays?

First grade informed me to get married you have to be pregnant. I politely said it doesn't always have to work that way and moved on!

Second graders can clear a room with their farts and there is no denial who did it because the kids jumped back and pointed. I will be honest I had to turn my head because all I could do was laugh.

Third grade really is aware of what is going on. I had students discussing Robin Williams suicide!

It doesn't matter how old they kids are they love to hug you! I have been practicing names like crazy and it helps when I get to see them more before and after school.

One fun fact about our school is we have 5 sets of twins in our halls! I have seen three sets for sure. I am on the look out for the rest. Talk about making the name game confusing!

I am super pumped for next week as it is a full week of students and getting to listen to Mrs. H open her cabinets and say "This one is my faavvvvoooriiitte cabinet, PAINT!"